Deal with the Devil

We loathe cutting our daughter’s toenails. Although, maybe loathe doesn’t quite cut it (ha!). Hate? Dread? Would rather pull our eyeballs out with tweezers? When OP knows that it’s time to trim those talons she tries to pass as toenails, she turns into a crazed banshee soccer player. One of us needs to hold her down while the other grasps her foot in a vice and tries desperately to trim her nails without cutting off a toe.

I’m surprised the neighbors haven’t called social services yet.

Anyway, it is such an awful experience that we put it off as much as we can, leading to sharp, nasty nails that look like she’s been on a deserted island for years. With all things we need to do that OP objects to (baths, diaper, medicine, etc), once we find a distraction or way around the issue, we’re good to go. We just haven’t found the way around this one, yet. Or have we.

Who knew these cute little toes would cause so much drama!

Who knew these cute little toes would cause so much drama!

Let me back up. I was what you might consider a tomboy from about 7th grade until well into college. I never wore dresses, heels, make-up, etc. I still don’t do the make-up, really. Okay, sometimes I do and only look like a clown half the time. The other half, I pay someone to do it for me. However, to this day, I will not, nor do I ever plan to, wear nail polish. I think it’s disgusting and just looks wrong. Except on you, it looks lovely on you. Okay, no. No it doesn’t. I just don’t like the stuff. At. All.

The other night, at gymnastics, my daughter pointed out another girl’s blue toenails and it made me start thinking. Ever since they did the letter N at school, OP has begun to mention nail polish. Not often, but enough to make me think it could be our way around the utter gall we have for cutting off her nails. So, we told her that if she is very brave and lets us cut her nails without all the hoopla, we would put on nail polish that she picks out.  (I’ve included her fingernails because while she let’s me do it with the TV on, I figured including it could help her get the idea with her toes.) She is utterly excited, and we’re going to look for a non-toxic, kid-friendly (Piggy Paint or something similar) this weekend with her help. She wants pink, blue, and green if you are curious.

I’m dying inside because I HATE nail polish, and I suspect it will get all over everything. But if that’s the deal I must make with the devil to get this to work, it’s one I’m willing to make. It could be worse. I could cut off her feet.

Wait until I ask you to get my legs waxed!

Wait until I ask you to get my legs waxed!


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